On social networking sites, What You See IS Not What You Get. There’s more to life than ‘˜Checking-in’, ‘˜Tagging’, ‘˜Poking’ and ‘˜Following’. Don’t let it ruin your relationship.
Aashana met the perfect guy in Ajay on a rainy evening. She ran into the dimpled-boy at a book store and they fell in love over the yellowing pages of Jane Eyre. When he swept her off her feet with Wilde-esque wit, she fell hook, line and sinker for him. Theirs was a match made in heaven (cheesy, you say?) and absolutely nothing could go wrong in this fairytale love story. But they had not realised the power of social media. If Facebook can help you land dates, it can also show you the door. These two learned it the hard way…at the cost of their relationship.
With Mumbai kicking off the Social Media Week (SMW13) from today, it’s the right time and platform to discuss how couples (even married) are going through a case of information overload that leads to break-ups and miseries. SMW13 will feature a host of workshops, seminars and exhibitions focused on social media in a number places in Mumbai and may be you can pick up a tip or two on how to keep your personal and professional lives separate.
So why did the lovey-dovey couple of Aashna and Ajay break-up? When on their first ‘anniversary’, Ajay said he would be working late, Aashna was a little disappointed. But when she logged-onto Facebook for a random update, she found an Instagram picture of her darling boyfriend with a office hottie. He was ‘tagged’ at an upscale pub, letting his hair down. That was enough to enrage Aashna, who stopped communicating with him. She didn’t call and clarify with him, thinking ‘what you see is what you get’. Even after repeatedly calling her, Ajay couldn’t reach her and didn’t know what to make out of the whole ‘incommunicado’ phase. It was only after six months that Aashna realised that Ajay was actually at a business meeting with a firang client who had set-up the discussion at a club. The poor chap had planned something really exotic for his ladylove post his meeting. Ouch. Ajay found someone and moved on, while Aashna’s guilt and shame has made her a social recluse.
On social networking sites, what you see is not what always you get. In a social setup, there is certain etiquette to be followed. If some girl chats up your boyfriend, it’s not a crime for him to reply. Being seen with colleagues outside of work isn’t wrong either. We are humans and we need people to survive, but this insecurity is shooting up due to our access to excess data. We know exactly when he/she is online, what they had for breakfast, how their day was…all through social media. Due to Facebook and Twitter, our emotions have become status updates, while conversations have been replaced with pings. It’s easier to track someone using the ‘Last Seen’ feature on WhtasApp, but when you see your better half pinging somebody else than you, it flips you out. Why have become so touchy all of a sudden? We grew up on landlines and letters, didn’t we? Mobile phones are a thing of the present…yet somehow, our dependency on technology has made us less attached to people.
If you’re planning to lie to your sweetheart to indulge in some ‘me’ time, you are bound to be found out, thanks to social media. It’s as much a bane as it’s a boon. This constant need for ‘keeping in touch’ is what breaking up relationships because too much of anything is not good. There’s more to life than ‘Checking-in’, ‘Tagging’, ‘Poking’ and ‘Following’…grow up! Don’t let networking sites rule you and don’t take things at face value. Confirm it with him/her, question them, communicate, text, call, meet…don’t restrict your relationship to chats alone.