How often you should have sex?

Isn’t this the most important question after “What is he purpose of my life?”

Okay, this might be an exaggeration, but trust me, there are so many people on the planet with  a hoard of doubts, apprehensions and confusions about sex that it is one of the top most questions, solicited from all the sex-therapists worldwide!

Today we are going to answer that, but before that, just put that pen and paper down and don’t even try to record the answer in your smartphone’s notepad! It’s no rocket science guys!

We can figure it out with ease! Get it?

Now, first of all answer this simple question: how often should you eat?

As many times as you feel hungry, right?

Well, likewise, sex is the basic human need and needs to be fulfilled as and when one feels the urge for it.

The question is being asked millions of time – How many times one should have sex in a relationship?

The hard truth is there is no specific number!

However, conditions apply!

1. First and foremost, you and your partner should be on the same page about sex. It depends on partners’ sex drive, health condition, mind-frame, age and sexual needs. If only one person desires it and the other person is not in the mood, then you cannot and should not push it down the throat! Well, not literally here, alright? So just wait for the right moment!

2. Secondly, have sex, but don’t obsess about it! There are a lot more things, important for life, than only sex, while I agree it is one of the important things! Therefore, make love when you know you are not ignoring another burning issue that needs your immediate attention! Your mind as it is would not be completely into it, if you are ignoring something important and trying to wrestle in bed, so what’s the point anyways? 

3. You know what, sex is not only about the physical union of two bodies; it touches the soul, the depth of our emotions that sometimes even we are not aware of. Thus, sex should not be treated as a chore or just a boring bodily function that needs to be performed as a custom on a daily basis. Make it special whenever you indulge in it and when you feel the need for that magical touch!

4. Also, The chemicals released during orgasm and when one feels the supreme bliss with another body, are largely responsible for the contending feeling of love, satisfaction and completeness. Sex shouldn’t be calculated in terms of numbers or the frequency of the act, but it must be counted on how satisfied it makes you after every session. And it’s not just about you, but for your partner as well. More the contentment, more the frequency!

5. The libido or sex drive also depends on how stressed or relaxed your life is, what age group you belong to, what is your gender and so on! Basically, your overall life is a great facilitator or moderator to sex! To have an absolutely rocking and pleasurable sex life, you got to take time out of your busy schedules, be tranquil and help your partner to get ready for the act, just the way you are. This will not only help in strengthening your bond, but will also make sure that every time you indulge in an intercourse, it gives you supreme pleasure.

6. You should try, put in efforts, and help each other to reach a stage where you both should be getting utter pleasure every time you indulge in it, then it wouldn’t matter how often you did or for how long every session lasted! The only things that’ll remain with both of you will be your deepest intimacy and love.

And that’s why honey buns, stop counting the numbers and the frequencies! Stop mulling over the question ” how often?”

Just go with the flow, create the love and romance much needed for life and live the moments fully, as and when they hit you!

Good luck to you all!

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Sex is the basic need!

Now that’s something we all know, but very few are bold enough to admit it openly.

In our country, sex is still taboo and talking about it in public is still considered to be disrespectful and embarrassing for most of us. Therefore when there is a lot of noise around that men only think about sex, men only want to bed women instead of being in a steady loyal relationship, men are only womanizers, it all sounds kind of shocking!

It is obvious that women are making all these comments and to be fair to the fairer sex, some men do fall in such categories. But isn’t generalizing a massive mistake? Not everyone is equal and not all men are same.

For some, sex is the only criteria for selecting a partner and might not think twice before sleeping around multiple women, but there are also men who stay loyal to their partners till they are together and are a couple.

It is a myth that only guys have high sex drives and women hardly want it! In fact both the sexes need it, just that the urge for it differs at different ages for both men and women. For example, men are high on sex right from their teenage and start slowing down by their mid or end 30’s after which they stabilize. However, for women the sexual urges start peaking after early 30’s and reaches its pinnacle towards late 30’s and early 40’s. This is the time when most men want more from their relationships in terms of compatibility and stability rather than just some action in bed. Of course that’s part of their demand list too, but it is not the be all and end all of everything.

Men are human beings too and we all are born with a basic set of emotions. Some of these emotions are hidden or suppressed since childhood owing to the set pattern of society and by the rules formed to guide how a man should lead his life. Sometimes it’s the peer pressure that makes a less self-aware man only seek sex when in reality his needs are more on the emotional level. Men who are violent in sexual relationships do it to satisfy some hidden need since childhood or to release some stress that is being built up owing to their incompetency elsewhere in life. Obviously it is not acceptable and such people should be punished for their acts. But the point is that our society doesn’t teach men how to deal with their emotions. Men are only taught to be strong, brave and courageous. When such men are faced with subtle or different emotions than these, they don’t know what to do! The result is expressing their power and authority by way of sex!

Sex is also a way of satisfying their egos that depend on how much sex they do and with how many girls! It is more of a peer pressure and society’s demand that a man is proven to be a man only if he is a bull in bed!

The real need for men in any relationship is to be loved, appreciated, cared and respected. But that is what anybody wants, male or female, right?

Only if men are taught from childhood to stay in touch with their emotional side and be ready to accept their weaknesses without falling for the need to constantly prove how manly they are, would they be able to live a complete life without giving the impression of being sexual freaks!

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