In-laws – Cost I paid for my success!
An open letter to the Indian society and it’s so called “norms” which aren’t normal
To all the Indian parents out there
Can you please end the double standards set which are different for daughters and daughter in laws and then you say bahu kabhi beti nahi ban sakti. Can a saas become mother and stop differentiating.
My mother in-law is a good woman ( at least I thought so till I realized) who loves me a lot, cooks for me, doesn’t allow me to do any house hold chores. On weekends asks me to take rest, go out and do what I love.
My first two years I fell more in love with my mother-in-law more than hubby as she loved me, so much and cared for me.
I was working in a big MNC and earned 2 lakhs per month she asked me to continue my job gave freedom had no problem with my over-time as well. I thought I am the luckiest women on planet earth. While everyone in my team used to complain about in-laws I always praised my in-laws.
Everything was perfect, perfect hubby, perfect in-laws, perfect job, I was enjoying honeymoon phase of my life.
Just then my younger sister gave birth to a baby girl and after spending time with her I just wanted to become mother and enjoy motherhood. I told my husband and he said “no this will affect your career” I said I am ok I worked for 8 years I earned enough now I want to be a complete women. To my surprise he said to his mom who brainwashed me and said beta you are doing good in career you are earning you should concentrate on your career not kids she asked me to wait for 1-2 years more. I thought she loves me after 5 years of marriage my sister-in-law gave birth to a baby boy and everyone was so happy for her. They loved this boy to the core but what stuck in my heart was when they love kids why they are not happy with me giving birth to baby.
I spoke to my mother-in-law that I have crossed age 33 and after 35 planning a baby can become difficult she said your career will get affected.
I said I don’t want to work and now want to have babies she said no you work we can adopt, I said why should I adopt when I am normal healthy and can bear my own child. She said because you earn good you don’t need to quit and sit at home. I spoke to my hubby he said same thing that you are not born for bringing up children you should work. I said I am not born to only work like a machine I kept quiet for 6 years but now I want to give birth. Discussions ended up in a brawl and then true colors of my hubby and sweet in-laws came out.
I was money earning machine for them they enjoyed all luxuries with my money all these years and I gave everything so stupidly with love to them.
They are ok with beti’s kids but not with bahu’s kids because” I am sonae kae Aande dene wali murgi for them” nothing more. ‘
My husband told me the only reason he married me because I am successful these words were enough to break me they used me all these years. I left my hubby and in-laws to face their own karma.
To the society
We give everything to your house but still daughters are your priority not daughter-in-laws why?
By a frustrated