To all those anorexic chicks and wannabe foodies

If you have been refraining yourself from eating to your heart’s content, you have certainly lost out on lots. But, always remember that it takes some mettle and merit to be called a real foodie. Here’s our guide…


Just as I am writing this story, I am gulping down spoonfuls of kheer, which I think has been made in milkmaid. Yes, that sinful little dabba of condensed milk which our mothers would hide from us and keep. Remember that covert operation? In the afternoon, when mom was asleep, we would tip-toe in the kitchen to swallow mouthfuls of that sweet, creamy goodness.

It gives me immense pleasure to think about food. Especially, when I am penning down a recipe, it becomes extremely difficult to console myself with the harsh reality that ‘listen… you are just writing about this dish. No matter how long you ogle at its picture, it is not going to enter your mouth’. Yes, many of you may think that I have taken food too seriously in my life, but I have no qualms about accepting myself as a hardcore foodie, being a weight-conscious, fashion-forward woman. And I strongly feel that people, read women, who deny having any fondness towards food, but check out what’s on someone else’s platter on the sly, should be fined. If you have been refraining yourself from eating to your heart’s content, I can’t even begin to tell you how much you have lost out on. So women, shed those inhibitions, stop staring at someone else’s plate and have your own. But, always remember that it takes some mettle and merit to be called a foodie or a gourmand (for those posh people). You really have to eat it out.

  1. Don’t give an angry stare to anyone who calls you a bhukkad. Instead, accept the title with grace and give that person a piece of your mind if she (we are counting probability here) happens to be the anorexic replica of Anushka Sharma or those Ftv hangers… oops… models walking the ramp.
  2. Say it if you are hungry and eat. If you happen to be in a group, never shy away from letting others know that your stomach is growling and you need to stuff it, preferably with good food.
  3. Never say no. You go to someone’s house and you are being offered something which you think may taste good, eat it at once. Don’t let that moment happen, ‘shit! I should have taken it.’
  4. Keep your dictionary in check. Read about terms, expressions and phrases associated with food and keep yourself updated with all the fancy names. You never know when you will have to throw in one. And please, for god sake, stop calling espresso expresso. It’s so juvenile!
  5. Wander in search of good food. Never compromise on quality, if you know where to find it. If a perfectly crisped aloo paratha is 100 metres away, walk the distance.
  6. Don’t wait for company. If you had a lunch plan and your friends ditched you at the last moment, go alone and treat yourself to a nice meal. Come back and text those ditchers about how good the food was.
  7. Become a pro. You will have to slowly build your repertoire of where to eat what and you can also start charging people for your expert advice on where one should go for golgappe in Mumbai and the likes. Wonder how Zomato and Burrp are making it big?
  8. Get your basics right. Don’t walk into a five-star hotel’s restaurant and pay a ridiculous amount for chhole bhature and chaat. They are meant to be had from roadside stalls.

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