#EpicFail: Predictions By God(Con)Men!

Blinded by the almighty power, Godmen and astrologers have been making fun of us all over life! We found a few really amusing trolls that made headlines. Read on to have a good laugh…

For a minute think if you were a domestic pet, say a dog for instance. Would you have bothered about ‘When is my birthday?’, ‘When will I get married?’, ‘Will I get the job of my dreams?’ or ‘Will I be rich enough?’ I guess not. That would have meant that the entire reign of spiritual leaders and astrologers would have gone out of business.

Having said that, my mind ponders, each time I see such predictions making news: are there guys really that jobless that they sit and figure what’s in the future for the celebrities? Why would they on their own, sit with the janam kundalis of celebrities and predict bizarre non-sense that we read and discuss it over dinner tables. Here are a few WTF predictions from the past…

Hrithik to remarry in 2015

My first reaction was… ‘That looks like a window of opportunity, must start making rounds around his house!’ I’m sure the man has still hasn’t gotten used to be separated and Bejan Daruwala goes on record saying that me MIGHT remarry. Does Daruwala uncle have a rishta for him? Or was he looking to increase in cliental of divorced men? I’m sure hearing this Greek god must have felt a little better and had a good laugh. 

Royal Baby reincarnation

*Almost broke the Television set*

Ok, let me get this right, royal baby is a BOY… Anupam V Kapil, felt that Royal baby was a reincarnation of his gorgeous grandmother Lady Diana. Don’t scar the poor baby, Kapil-ji! When he grows up, be assured the entire British army might hunt you and beat you up for making fun of the little one at his birth. The worst came when Simi Chandoke goes on national television’s prime time with this… 

Gold digger

This was 2013’s best troll. Shobhan Sarkar, local (*Cough* dhongi) baba, had a dream that the region of Daundia Khera village in Unnao district of Uttar Pradesh has over 1000 tonnes of gold hidden below the layers of mother earth. He convinced the Union minister of State Charan Das Mahant to dig the property to search for the hidden gold. After 11 days they finally gave up we wonder who bore the expenses of this 11 days long archaeological survey.

Doomsday conspiracy

This was a troll of the millennium! Just because centuries back the guys who made our calendar got lazy, few of the smart people decided to freak the whole world out! That in short was the Mayan troll planned on us!

Blinded by faith and celestical gibbrish, the AAM aadmi gets made fun of by these astrologers. I believe it is high time we stop tripping over such cheap publicity stunts and get a life! And you majnus out there, stop asking these dhongi babas,”BABA, are you sure I’ll get married to Sheela?” Sheela still needs to get jawan and remember her own name! 


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