Dating is fun or is it a nightmare?

Well, for most of the people, first date is worse than a nightmare with butterflies in the stomach, excitement shooting through the roof and the urge to impress the opposite sex skyrocketing! Yes, we all think that may be this date will turn out to be the first in a series of many more and eventually might turn into something called love! It is like the entire life depends on this first date and the fear of failure might affect the courage quotient for any such future endeavours.

We bring to you the worst 12 First Date Fears you encounter during your first date and ways to handle them to make your date super successful!

1) What to wear?

Yes, this is not only the concern of girls, but also of the guys! Obviously your dressing sense is going to make a mighty impression on your date, but getting overly anxious or finicky will not help. Simple solution: wear what you’re comfortable in and it will show in your body language. It will definitely make a good first impression!

2) How to greet?

There is always this awkwardness about how to greet. A good hug or just shake hands or may be just a nod of head with the guy pulling out the chair for the lady to sit? Well, don’t fret about it so much. Don’t prepare, go with the flow and meet as casually as possible. Your date is a human being, not someone from an outer planet, so relax!

3) What to talk?

This question perplexes most of us as we don’t know our date that well and feel awkward to initiate a conversation. Best thing is to start discussing common things like weather and casual stuff about work and traffic etc. slowly you’ll find your groove and based on the answers, you can gauge what your date wants to talk about!

4) Nothing in common!

What if there is nothing in common? Yes, in that case you can’t be staring at the walls and getting embarrassed! In such a scenario, just probe and let the other person talk. And then talk about yourself in a way that is not boastful or arrogant, but just to make the other person comfortable. Mind you, your date will be as nervous as you are!

5) Choice of food

This is again a big dilemma. You ask your date to order as per his/her choice and then repent the food they order. It could be spicy or bland and may be not of your liking! Well, don’t be so formal; ask for another dish without embarrassing them that their choice was wrong. Just say that you know another dish that the said restaurant is good at and you want your date to taste it too!

6) Table Manners

Yeah, not all of us are well trained as far as table manners are concerned. That shouldn’t be the stumbling block though! Make sure you eat like a civilized human being without creating a mess, unlike you eat at home with legs on the table and using your fingers! Rest should be alright!

7) Where to focus!

Yes, for some people food is such a priority that they forget the world around them while eating. If you’re one of those, practice to balance your focus on your date and food simultaneously. It might be so easy, but with time you’ll master the art! You don’t want to be found in a situation where you’re only focusing on food or only on your date making them embarrassed!

8) Bill Payment

With women being equal partners, it does become tricky when you see your date ordering and your thoughts are on how much money you have in your wallet! Well, best thing is to be open and ask to dutch! This way, even if date is a failure, you can maintain dignity.

9) Crazy ideas

Your date may have crazy ideas of adventure like bungee jumping or paragliding which scare the crap out of you. Worry not; just say that you’re ready for different things, but only one step at a time. See, you’re not saying a no, but not even a yes!

10) Meeting your ex!

This could be straight from a Bollywood movie, but you never know. May be circumstances are so unfavourable for your new love-life to being that you bump into your ex! Here, simple thing is to meet them cordially and don’t get excited or nervous or angry about the situation. Show maturity that you have moved past your ex and are ready for a new beginning!

11) Goodbye time

This is weird situation. Movies show us that the date ends with a kiss, in some extreme situations you might also get space to make out. Reality is entirely different! Just go with your gut feeling, after analyzing how your entire evening went and do the best! You won’t regret it!

12) Bad hugs

Yeah this is another fear we all have! Trying to hug or kiss and end up hugging sideways as if we met long distance acquaintance in a public place! Again, just go by what your heart says and follow the leads by your date’s body language! You’ll be fine!

Drive away your fears and enjoy your date! First dates are important yet they bring with memories to cherish for a long time. Don’t let fears overpower you!

The post These Are The 12 First Date Fears You Need To Get Over With! appeared first on Youngisthan.in.

Our bodies have a language of their own, and their words aren’t always kind!

Your body language has likely become an integral part of who you are, to the point where you might not even think about it. Bodies act on their own, and give outward signals of what it desires. It happens with most of us, unless you are an expert on controlling your body language.

If you are not, it’s time to start, because you could be sabotaging your career, because unspoken signals have strong powers of communication and they monitor the body language accordingly.

Here are some usual body language goof ups that people make in office, and emotionally intelligent people are careful enough to avoid: 

Slouching (A Serious Sign of Disrespect)

If you continuously slouch while in a meeting or sitting in front of your boss, It communicates that you’re bored and have no desire to be where you are. You would never tell your boss, “I don’t understand why I have to listen to you,” but if you slouch, you don’t have to say that —your body says it for you, loud and clear.

The brain is hardwired to equate power with the amount of space you take up. Standing or sitting up straight with your shoulders back is a power position. It maximizes the amount of space you fill. Slouching, on the other hand, is the result of collapsing your form—it takes up less space and projects less power.

Maintaining good posture commands respect and promotes engagement from both ends of the conversation.

Slouching (A Serious Sign of Disrespect)

Exaggerated Hand and Body Gestures

A lot of quick hand movements can imply that you’re stretching the truth. Aim for small, controlled gestures to indicate leadership and confidence, and open gestures, like spreading your arms apart or showing the palms of your hands, to communicate that you have nothing to hide. Exaggerated nodding signals anxiety about approval. People may perceive your heavy nods as an attempt to show you agree with or understand something that you actually don’t.

Exaggerated Hand and Body Gestures

Continually Watching the Clock

If you keep staring the clock or your wrist watch while talking to someone, it is a clear sign of disrespect, impatience, and inflated ego. It sends the message that you have better things to do than talk to the person you’re with, and that you’re anxious to leave them.

Leaning or Looking Away From the Person

Turning yourself away from others, or not leaning into your conversation, portrays that you are disengaged, uninterested, uncomfortable, and perhaps even distrustful of the person speaking. Try leaning in towards the person who is speaking and tilt your head slightly as you listen to them speak. This shows the person speaking that they have your complete focus and attention. Avoiding eye contact also makes it look like you have something to hide, and that arouses suspicion. Lack of eye contact can also indicate a lack of confidence and interest, which you never want to communicate in a business setting. Try to make a pleasant and constant eye contact.

Leaning or Looking Away From the Person

Crossed Arms And Crossed Legs

Crossed limbs in front of your body are the physical barriers that suggest you’re not open to what the other person is saying. Even if you’re smiling or engaged in a pleasant conversation, the other person may get a nagging sense that you’re shutting him or her out, or you are trying to hide something. Even if folding your arms feels comfortable, resist the urge to do so if you want people to see you as open-minded and interested in what they have to say.

Crossed Arms And Crossed Legs

Disapproving Facial Expressions

Inconsistency between your words and your facial expression causes people to sense that something isn’t right and they begin to suspect that you’re trying to deceive them, even if they don’t know exactly why or how. For example, a nervous smile while rejecting an offer during a negotiation won’t help you get what you want; it will just make the other person feel uneasy about working with you because they’ll assume that you’re up to something.

Disapproving Facial Expressions

Some other very common body language signals that you need to control in office:

Fidgeting with or fixing your hair: It conveys that you’re anxious, over-energized, self-conscious, distracted and overly concerned with your physical appearance instead of job at hand.

Constantly looking down as you talk:  Clear signs of lack of confidence or being self-conscious, causing your words to lose their effect. It’s especially important to keep your eyes level if you’re making complicated or important points.

Intense Stare: Eye contact that’s too intense may be perceived as aggressive, or an attempt to dominate.

Rolling the eyes: A fail-proof way to communicate a lack of respect.

Scowling or having a generally unhappy expression: It sends the message that you’re upset by those around you, even if they have nothing to do with your mood.

Weak or overtly strong handshakes: A weak handshake signal that you lack authority and confidence, while a handshake that is too strong could be perceived as an aggressive attempt at domination, which is just as bad. Adapt your handshake to each person and situation, but make sure it’s always firm.

Standing too close to someone: It signals that you have no respect for or understanding of personal space. This will make people very uncomfortable when they’re around you.

The Crux of The Matter

Smiling is one constructive body sign that suggests that you’re open, trustworthy, confident, and friendly. Studies have shown that the human brain responds favorably to a person who’s smiling, and this leaves a lasting positive impression.

Well, avoiding these body language blunders will help you form stronger relationships, both professionally and personally.

If you can think of any other such body language blunders, please do share with

The post These Destructive Body Language Signs Can Definitely Ruin Your Career! appeared first on Youngisthan.in.