Humour

Here’s What Happens To You When You Try Chinese Beauty Tools For The First Time

Chinese beauty tools – In the time and age of influencers and beauty bloggers who are constantly giving you beauty goals, taking care of your skin has become a preoccupation for you.

It is the YouTube beauty bloggers that are taking up more space in your leisure than the stand-up comedians and we are not complaining. This has stretched to an alarming extent and you are trying your hands at weird beauty tools too, we are still not complaining but trying out Chinese beauty tools is a bit too much for you girls, some of them look like miniature roadrollers to us, ugh! hey don’t despair, we know you are desperate to get prettier and it is not criminal to try out new things.

But wait, here are some Chinese beauty tools that beyond our understanding and if I were to try these, would definitely goofed things up!

Chinese beauty tools –

1 – Skin Gym:

This is widely available in China and otherwise called the ‘Natural Facelift’ believed the avert ageing. If you want to subtract years from your looks, you definitely try this, they say but wait! what is that Amoeba’s distant cousin for? one more question, will those put our skin through cardio or strength training?

2 – Jade Roller:

Sounds ..erm! looks pretty much like road roller to us. Are we supposed to subject our face to that? how is that going to help us anyway? well, this is an ancient beauty tool and horses pulled roadrollers in the archaic times, what could it probably mean? we would require horses too? or perhaps a stable? no thank you! let us age gracefully.

3 – Diamond V-fit Mask:

Here’s presenting the weirdest of all, the facelifting Diamond V-fit Mask which claims or perhaps works to give your face a V shape without having to workout in the gym. Hey guys, we do it in cheaper way in India, we chew chewing gum a lot. tada!

4 – Nasobial Iron:

This claims to straighten your wrinkles, a straightening iron at that whoa! so that sums up, you will need to press your face with an iron like your clothes. Hmm.. we need to get our head around it soonest.

5 – Hansa Sun Nose Straightener:

As if the face straightener wasn’t enough, they gave us the nose straightener which claims to straighten your flat nose. In India, we are at the butt of all jokes if our noses look like cowdung but this will come to our rescue it seems. Why don’t they sell these a lot in Indian stores? we need it desperately, man!

6 – Fullips Lip Enhancer Tool:

Huh?! now we all can have natural pouts to give Angelina Jolie a run for her money. Fullips Lip Enhancer Tool claims to pump up your lips by making it exercise. *rolls the eyes in awe*

These are Chinese beauty tools – So let us take the bull by the horn and look beautiful, because why not?

Shreyashi Das

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Shreyashi Das

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