Categories: Specials

Living with a guy? Watch out for these things

Now that you’re planning to move-in with your boyfriend, there are certain things that you should keep in mind. They are going to be lot more different from your girl roomies and if you want to avoid pulling each other’s throats out, read on!

Men won’t take bath regularly
Don’t turn up your nose if he says ‘Kal Hi Toh Nahaya Tha’! Yes, men don’t believe in hygiene as much as you do. They may be stickler for other things like hitting the gym regularly, completing projects on time and so on, but ask them to get under the shower and all hell will be upon you. They really don’t like to move their asses, so let it go. If on a Sunday when your side of the family is coming over and your husband-to-be is still running around in dirty shorts, don’t flip out and cry bloody murder. Take a deep breath and purchase an air freshener.

They cook, you clean after them
If he agrees to prepare the breakfast before you dash out for an early morning meeting, don’t secretly thank your stars for bringing him to you. He will cook, sure…but the amount of mess that he would pile up in the kitchen is something you don’t even want to imagine. All your grandma’s secret ingredients will be all over the place and cleaning up after him will rob you off any love you may have for him. Most women will brush it aside saying, ‘at least he tried!’ but you can’t go on saying that. If he cooks, you gotta clean after him. Understand that, so that life is a lot simpler!

Get ready for TV war:
You may be smitten with each other and still in the can’t-take-hands-off-each-other phase, but that doesn’t mean that he wouldn’t go ninja on you if you tried to switch channels when his favourite match is on. You both may like the same kind of movies and music, but you’d definitely not enjoy certain violent /gory/sporty/boring stuff that he likes…so, there’s going to be a war every frigging day. Get two TVs or record your shows. There’s no point fighting over it as soon you’ll have kids who will have their own set of programs to watch. Phew!

Farts, burps and scratches galore:
If he is farting right in your face, he is going to marry you. Because the kind of comfort level he shares with you, he is not going to be able to do that with anybody else. Yeah! Men work in weird ways. They will fart, burp and scratch in front of you, if they feel that you’re the love of their life. So don’t be upset if you have to deal with constant ‘small bombs’ through the day. Also, one day they’re going to put on hell lot of weight, lose their hair, become less active in bed and going to fart a lot more. Game for all this?

All-year-round chauffer:
From picking up from work to dropping you off to your mother’s, he is going to chauffer you around the rest of your life. He is quite content being in the driver’s seat (literally and figuratively) and would be happy to do it if you stayed out of his way. Living with a boy has its own advantage as you can always count on him for rescuing you from any and every situation. Yay! And all those women out there who drive…hey! Your car can break down and you’d need him to come pick you up. But this is mostly for those ladies who don’t or can’t drive.

There’s never going to be enough eggs:
However well stocked you may be, your eggs, milk, ready to eat and knick knacks are going to disappear. He loves his quick bites in between meals and won’t think twice before finishing up the entire packet of foods! He will assume that you have already eaten or are not hungry and continue to munch on food. Make it a rule that if he indulges in between-meals-bites, he needs to run down a fetch whatever he has gulped down. Will he agree? He will. Guys are quite reasonable like that (ha!).

Vaishnavi Iyer

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Vaishnavi Iyer

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