Categories: Humour

8 Hilarious Skills That People Added To Their Resume Which Cracked The Interviewers Up!

If you have been to interviews, you would know that there is a common, rather, undeniable question that all the interviewers ask the candidates, and that is; “Why should we hire you?”

You just cannot avoid this question, even though you have listed in your resume, some of the extraordinary skills that you possessed. Been there, done that all!

Probably this is the reason, some people decided to satiate the skill thirst of the interviewers and stated some of the mind-boggling skills in their resumes.

So here, I am going to narrate to you, 8 hilarious skills that people added to their resume which cracked the interviewers up:

1.  A young lad who applied for the post of an application programmer, explained his skills something like this: 

I am boiled rice which is eaten with curd! *Talk about metaphors* 😛 I am like a boiled white rice (having a good understanding and conceptual knowledge of core programming concepts, database and its concepts for the backend, server-side programming, technologies, frameworks, etc, for business layers or middle layer, design patterns for best practices, UI for frontend or presentation layer).

This white rice is used to prepare any type of rice items i.e can be used to make curd rice (PHP developer) or lemon rice (Java developer) or rice bhaat (.net developer) or ghee rice (mobile developer) or any type of rice (XYZ developer team).

If you aren’t laughing already, I don’t blame you for your HQ!

2.  Under the tab “Course Completed” in the resume, this over enthu candidate wrote:

Morning and Evening exercise! Completed with total energy!

Who would have thought of that, now? Well, maybe this was put in all hilarity but, nevertheless, the applicant ended up facing the consequences.

 

3.  In the “Objective” section of a neatly aligned resume a prospective job seeker jotted down: 

Objective: To dive into a swimming pool of gold coins like Uncle Scrooge McDuck.

Now that, ladies and gentlemen,  I call an absolute DARE!

 

4.  Another one took the skills part a bit too seriously and mentioned:

‘An exceptional poker player’!

While we do understand that playing Poker is a serious skill but may be not for a job application at IIT Mumbai! Well the lad was definitely interviewed. And during the interview, the interviewer called for a pack of cards and they played Heads up Poker for around 20 minutes. And that’s it. He never was selected!

 

5.  Don’t underestimate the power of a blood donating common man applying for a job:

Yeah! That’s right. Never ever do that!

A guy had applied for a management post and he had written “Blood Donation” under the “Achievements” section. How skilful and overachieved already!

 

6.  Failing a semester is no less a skill:

Especially when everyone in the bunch is hell-bent on pass with flying colours. This sirfira types interview candidate proudly mentioned that he managed to fail the semester in a class of 50 students.

What a skill man! What a skill!!

 

7.  Philosophy is a skill and it pays:

When a tad too philosophical guy summed up his CV in a rather melancholic tone

“The height of candle may differ, but they yield the same brightness. It’s not the matter of my experience, but it’s my ability that actually shines.”

And that’s it. There was nothing more to it. Take it or leave it! Huh!!

 

8.  This last resume rundown takes all the awards as the skills mentioned could not match anywhere with anyone: 

ACHIEVEMENTS – I came first in the school long distance race.

HOBBIES – Horse riding, I like going pub when haven’t got my kids. Looking after kids and doing stuff with them when they are not at school.

EMAIL ADDRESS – lazybum@fmail.com

ACHIEVEMENTS – Being Sober

ABOUT ME – I am me because I cannot be anyone else.

REASON FOR LEAVING LAST JOB – It was too much hard work.

PERSONAL PROFILE – I am a highly energetic person who can watch movies all day. I love numbers and I can count the beer cans I finish in a night. Me and my wife love working together because it saves the electricity bills! I can do tricky sums when I put my mind to it. I am Computer literate and I have a Facebook profile

Phew, weren’t these just some of the phenomenal skills?

Well, If you’re thinking to incorporate these into your CV, try it at your own risk.

Kaha suna maaf!

Charu Ahuja

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Charu Ahuja

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